Debunking the Myth That We Can Do it All
Vol. 1, No. 18
You’re reading Modern Motherhood Musings, a weekly newsletter written from one mom to another. Each week I share an honest reflection on motherhood, and a collection of things bringing me joy. I’m passionate about community, and I hope that by sharing our stories, we all feel a little less alone.
📝 This week’s musing…
This week, after a chaotic afternoon involving a note from school, a work conference call where I didn't feel prepared, and a last-minute run to Target for end-of-the-year class party items, I found myself in tears. "I just feel like I'm failing at everything" I told Brandon.
As a working mom, I understand the challenges of juggling a full-time corporate career while raising two energetic boys under the age of four. There’s immense pressure to excel in every role we play - as an employee, a wife, and a mom - and a million to do’s for each of them.
And the influence of social media can make it seem like everyone is effortlessly meeting these expectations, with flawless makeup, pristine homes, and perfectly behaved children to boot. But the reality is, doing it all is downright impossible.
I like to think about it like a pie chart where each section represents a role that we play. Some weeks, the "mom" slice might be bigger while we have to push lower priorities off at work, or some weeks, the "work" slice might be bigger while our mess at home piles up a bit. You cannot do more than 100%, and if someone makes you feel like they are, they probably have help.
Recently, someone in our mom's text thread shared her feelings of mom guilt because she couldn't make it to a "Muffins with Mom" event at her daughter's school due to her work schedule. She was heartbroken.
But you know what happened after she shared that? Others felt encouraged to share their own struggles, where they thought they were letting someone down, or things were falling through the cracks. It was a powerful moment of connection, realizing that we were all navigating similar challenges.
The more we can share about our struggles, the more realistic having a full-time corporate career while being a mom will become. We need to remember that it's okay to admit we can't do it all. Some days, the best we can do is just get through them. By normalizing these conversations we realize we're not alone. There's incredible power in vulnerability and immense strength in community.
Let's start changing the narrative. Instead of glossing over the hard parts or pretending we have it all together, let's be open about our challenges. Share the moments when the laundry is piled high, the email inbox is overflowing, and the kids are having meltdowns. It's in these honest conversations that we find camaraderie and reassurance that we're all just doing our best.
To all the moms out there, I want you to know that you are not failing. You are managing a complex balancing act, and that in itself is a significant accomplishment. Let's support each other by sharing our realities, offering a helping hand, and most importantly, taking care of ourselves. Remember, we're in this together, and together we can debunk the myth that we can do it all, all the time.
✨ Friday favorites…
🧴I love the free EWG app to take the stress out of choosing safer products for my kids. Scan items in the app while you’re out shopping for things like sunscreen to find health and safety ratings.
🧖🏻♀️ The Nodpod has become my latest obsession. It’s a weighted mask for your eyes that feels so good after staring at screens all day. Just 3 minutes and you’ll feel the magic!
💄 I guess I’m all about some eye-care lately, because I’m loving this Indie Lee I-Waken Eye Serum. I’ve been using it every night and it’s so cooling and hydrating (linking a small biz because I ♥️ to support local).
👯♀️ From one mom, to another…
Your words of wisdom, best piece of advice, and favorite hacks can make a difference in another mom’s journey. What has helped you survive this season? Email me to be featured in an upcoming newsletter.
Always put your baby in a diaper one size larger than the recommended size on the box. It’ll save you from lots of blowouts and leaks!
- A NICU nurse during Will’s NICU stay
Happy Friday, friends! I hope you all have a great long weekend. Thank you for reading the week’s musing!
